Computer Ninja’s Weblog

A friend of mine sent this along!

Taking Care of Babies

An example of one of the pictures there:

Tags: babies, Comedy, Humor, jokes

I got this sent to me by an employee of mine. Thanks Beshi!!

Tags: jokes

Thanks Tortilla!

Q. What do a gynaecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common?
A. They can both smell it, but can’t eat it.

Q. You know why they say that eating oysters will improve a man’s sex life?
A. Because women know if he’ll eat one of those, he’ll eat anything!

Q. Why does a bride smile when she’s walking down the aisle?
A. She knows she’s given her last blow job.

Q. Why is the space between a woman’s breasts and her hips called a waist?
A. Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.

Q. What is the definition of “making love”?
A. Something a woman does while a guy is fucking her.

Q. Did you hear Richard Simmons had plastic surgery to get his love handles removed?
A. Yeah…now he has no ears.

Tags: jokes

I love Little Johnny jokes. Thanks again, Tortilla!

The Polite way to pee

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners,
asked her students the following question:

“Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,
how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”

Michael said, “Just a minute I have to go pee.” The teacher responded by
saying, “That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?”

Sherman said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll
be right back.”

“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at
the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your
good manners?”

“I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to
shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce
you to after dinner.”

The teacher fainted…

Tags: jokes

I got this joke from my friend, Tortilla Man!

A little boy walks into his parents’ room to see his mom on top of
his dad bouncing up and down. the mom sees her son and quickly dismounts,
worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find
him.

The son sees his mom and asks, “What were you and Dad doing?”

The mother replies, “Well, you know your dad has a big tummy and
sometimes I have to get on top of it and help flatten it.”

“Your wasting your time,” said the boy.

“Why is that?” the mom asked puzzled.

“Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets
on her knees and blows it right back up.”

Tags: jokes